1. You don’t have to pressure your co-workers into buying popcorn, wrapping paper or candy bars for your kids’ school.
2. You can go to the school play in your own living room—in your pajamas.
3. You can conduct the PTA meeting while driving in your car with your spouse.
4. You don’t have to buy school uniforms.
5. You get no surprises at report card time.
6. No school bully can steal lunch money. If he tries, you can send him to his room until he repents.
7. You don’t have to prepare for any last-minute science projects.
8. Your kids won’t catch head lice.
9. Your child can take aspirin during school hours without being arrested.
10. You don’t have to prepare lunches before breakfast.

©2009 The Girton Group, All rights reserved. This list may be redistributed with proper credit given.